Rick and the Doctor
by Iruka Sensei871
Summary: When Rick decides to match wits with the Doctor he finds out that he might not be the smartest person in the universe. Morty gets caught in the middle. 10th and 1st Doctor. Donna/10th Doctor (one sided) Rated M for language. Lots of language, because it's Rick.


After he got used to the Jerry Day Care idea, Morty decided Blitz and Chitz was the best place ever. He'd only really seen the Roy VR machine, which he could do without, but for his birthday Rick took him and gave him tons of chitz to play with.

The first time he'd been there he hadn't looked around much. He was too stressed to really take it in, but Rick had told him before they left Earth that it was just a day out, and that made it easier to relax and enjoy the outing.

Rick looked down and smiled at Morty, ruffling his hair a little too hard, but when Morty looked up and saw him smiling he felt happy, something he didn't get to experience often.

The first thing he heard was the loud siren that announced someone had won one of the games, complete with a spinning blue and red light over an arcade. Two employees who looked almost human except for their blue skin ran over and put a paper crown on another Morty, whose Rick looked smug at his grandson's winnings.

"We'll try that one l…later, Morty," Rick said. "We can't let that M…Morty show you up, can we?"

Fortunately, Rick was distracted by the scantily clad waitress carrying around a tray full of drinks. Rick grabbed one of the tikki mugs that held something that smoked out of the top, sending a blue fog rolling down the side. He pulled the little umbrella out and stuck in his pocket absently, taking a big swig of the drink.

Morty grimaced. He had hoped Rick might stay sober. It did happen sometimes, and those were some of his favorite memories.

It was like a casino for kids and adults, with lights everywhere. The arcade was Morty's favorite part. He wasn't very good at the fighting games, but he tried all the games that involved racing or piloting, and Rick got excited every time he'd win.

"You're not a bad pilot," Rick said. "It's too b…bad you can't fly like that in real life."

"I could if you taught me," Morty said. "I only fly when you're to d…drunk to handle it."

Rick's good humor soured for a moment, and he took a drink from the mug.

 _Dammit,_ Morty thought. Rick had hardly drunk all day, and it was nice having him semi-sober.

"Ok hot shot," Rick said. "Let's do it." He grinned in a way that always made Morty nervous.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Morty said.

"Nope, too late now," Rick said. "Let's go. Cash in your chips and we'll go to the Super Cosco out in the Neubulone System. It's their Christmas, sort of, and the parking lot should be empty."

"Rick, I don't kn…know about this," Morty said.

Rick rolled his eyes. "You don't know about anything. URP…just get in the car." Rick turned the mug up and drank the rest of the cocktail quickly, a bit rolling down his chin.

When Morty opened the door to Rick's ship a few beer cans spilled out, and he saw Rick take a baggie out of his pocket, pull out a bit of pink powder, and sniff it quickly.

Rick's smile became even more concerning, because his eyes glittered and shone with whatever drug he'd just inhaled.

"C'mon Morty! You'll b…be a real pilot in no time!"

Morty hated how Rick drove when he was high, but there wasn't much traffic, so Rick swerving around and "driving artistically" as he called it didn't endanger anyone. Morty still gripped the sides of his seat so tightly his knuckles hurt as Rick barely stopped in time to avoid crashing into the entrance to the dome.

The Super Cosco was a massive building sitting alone in space. It was easily 5 stories, and Morty thought he could have put two of his schools on one floor alone.

"Whoa," he said. "Look at the size of that thing."

"Huh?" Rick said. "I take you all across the un…URP…universe and that's what impresses you? Super Cosco?"

He let Morty take the seat.

"Don't change my s…seat settings, you little shit!" Rick said.

"I can't reach the controls," Morty said.

"Ok, but you'd better put it back when you're finished."

Morty tried to land the ship on the parking lot, which was just like a regular parking lot on Earth. He pushed the lever forward to lower the ship, but he pushed it too fast and the ship dropped sharply, jolting both of them.

"Jesus Morty! Don't tear the ship apart!" Rick said. "Just d…drive on the pavement for awhile."

Morty moved the ship forward in jerks and starts, feeling more embarrassed and frustrated with every moment.

Finally Rick stopped him. "You're going to give us b…both neck injuries, idiot," he said. "Let me show you how."

They traded seats and Rick moved about the pavement, explaining how to move around. He moved the ship smoothly, even high, as long as he concentrated.

"I know how to do it," Morty said. "I just can't f…fly with you watching me like this."

Rick climbed into the back of the car and lay down, having to fold his long legs to fit the ship. Morty wondered if he was going to be tall like Rick someday. "Fine, smart ass. I'm not watching you. Just try not to…URP…not to do anything dumb like hit a light pole or anything."

Four light poles were all that Morty saw on the entire parking lot. They reflected off the atmospheric dome above and provided enough light to give almost a day like glow to the parking lot. They hummed loudly.

"I think I can avoid f…four poles," Morty said.

Rick snored behind him.

"Rick, wake up," Morty said.

Rick jerked awake. "What is it? Where are the guns?"

"I want you to see that I can d…drive good."

"I thought you c…couldn't do it with me w…w…watching," Rick said.

"I guess," Morty said. "Can you j…just watch and not say anything? You m…make me nervous."

Rick stayed quiet in the back while Morty wheeled around the lot easily. Without Rick in sight Morty lifted off and drove lazily under the dome.

"Huh. You are g…good at something after all," Rick said. "How about that?"

Morty's heart soared. It was the first compliment Rick had ever given him, had ever given anyone as far as he could remember.

"Thanks' Rick. That m…means a lot."

"Yeah, yeah." Rick said. "Don't be a girl about it. Now you can drive and I can sl…sleep."

Despite that, Rick took the wheel as soon as they entered traffic.

"You know Rick, sometimes you're not so b…bad to be with," Morty said.

"Sometimes you're not an annoying little pr…prick," Rick said, but he smiled when he said it. "How about we get Summer and…URP…get some ice cream?"

A few days later Rick stumbled into Morty's bedroom and shook him awake. Morty was conscious of Rick's alcohol soaked breath before he was awake enough to understand what he was saying. "C…c'mon Morty. We gotta go. We gotta…URP… It's gonna be great Morty. We…we…we're gonna fuck with the biggest dick in history."

"W…we're going to kill Hitler?" Morty asked.

"Your thinking…URP…thinking small. You have such a planetary mindset." Rick drank directly from a vodka bottle. "And I can't kill him. I…ULP…I've tried. So I can only fu..fu…fuck with him. Let's do this."

"Rick, I'm tired," Morty said.

Rick grabbed him by the wrist and pulled him downstairs.

"Ow, Rick! That's my sore wrist!"

Rick dropped Morty's hand. "Then keep up, damn it. That's how you got yourself hu...BLURP…hurt in the first place, remember? Not keeping up? It was just yesterday. Surely even you didn't forget that quickly."

Rick staggered, and Morty knew it wasn't going to be a fun night. He knew how much alcohol Rick had had by how he managed to walk, and Rick seemed to be very drunk.

"I could d…drive," Morty said.

"Like I'm going to let you d…do that," Rick said. "I'd like to keep the ship in one piece."

"You let me at the Super Cosco," Morty said.

"Yeah, well, not now," Rick said.

"Couldn't we j…just use a portal?" Morty asked. "You're too drunk to drive."

"I'll tell you when I'm too d…drunk to drive," Rick said. "And I can't use portals to get everywhere. This is a place that has too much of a magnetic field. You should…URP…should know that by now, dumbass."

Space travel bored Morty. It really wasn't that much different than being in a car, except that there was nothing around but blackness. He no longer found the stars and passing planets interesting. They were just landmarks to him. He fell asleep in the uncomfortable seat, hoping that Rick got whatever he was on about out of his system so they could go home.

A thump woke Morty. "W..w..wake up Morty. We're here." Rick drank from his flask, belched loudly, and vomited slightly. "Ugh. Don't eat burritos and drink vodka Morty."

"I wasn't planning to," Morty said.

It was night outside on whatever planet they were on, and silent. Morty heard a chirping call that might have been from a bird or insect. It was high pitched, almost like a scream, and it made Morty shudder. "What kind of dimension is this?" Morty asked. He rubbed his eyes and yawned.

"A dangerous one," Rick said. "Be..be on your toes Morty. This is the planet of the three headed, dog eating, ravenous thunderblog people."

"Ooooo…" Morty screeched in horror.

"They eat the dogs that eat..eat..you, Morty. They eat you really slow."

"Why would you come here then?" Morty asked.

"I'm just fucking…URP…with you Morty. It's a bad place, but no worse than ours, I guess."

"Why would you do that, you asshole?" Morty yelled.

"Because I'm bored. URRRPP. He's late."

"Fuck you, Rick."

"You're not my type, dumbass."

The place Rick had chosen looked odd. Even though it was night the moon lit the landscape so brightly that it was almost half as bright as normal daylight on Earth. It gave everything an odd, gray look. A dark lake sloshed lazily, looking like slow moving waves of ink in the darkness. The only building in sight was nearby, a stark utility shack silhouetted against the horizon. It was as if someone had sucked all the color from the landscape, leaving only a palette of barren gray expanse. Even the vegetation seemed washed out and dead.

"Is he in there?" Morty asked.

"Use your brain, Morty. I just said he's late."

"Who is he then?" Morty said.

"He's a dark god, Morty. He's the reason…ULP…the reason I won't time travel anymore. He's the dick that keeps me from do…doing that."

"You mean someone beat you?" Morty asked.

"No. Of course not. He ju..just stole my technology, and he can f…find me if he wants. URRP. Apparently I have a loud signature, whatever that means."

"So he did beat you," Morty said.

"How would you like to live in this place forever?" Rick asked. "Shut up. I could get the stuff I bought from him easily from other people,…bu..but I want him to do it for me. You'll see why."

They waited two hours, and Rick gradually grew more sober. He still drank occasionally, but Morty saw his movements slowly become more coordinated.

A large blue police box appeared with awful grinding noises.

"Is that a phone booth?" Morty asked, "like the one th..that superman changes clothes in?"

"Sort of…UUURRRPP." Rick put his hand over his stomach. "Ohhh. I think something was wrong with that burr…UGG…burrito. Look Morty. He's gonna look like a harm…harmless old man, but he's really smart. Not as smart as me, but smart, and cunning. Be careful."

Rick pushed a button on his ship and the windows became dark. "I don't want him seeing inside my ship."

The door opened, and a thin young man with dark hair wearing a suit, trench coat and sneakers stepped out. Rick pulled his pistol. "Get in the ship Morty! It's a trap! That's not him."

The man held up his hands. "Don't do anything rash, Rick. It's me. I just look different now."

"I've seen some plastic surgery in my ti…URP…time, but there's no way you took 50 years off and completely changed your voice. Where is the Doc…Doctor?"

"It's complicated," the Doctor said. "My people change. That's all I'm going to explain to you. Did you bring the part?"

"Not so fast," Rick said. "This could be some kind of sting. How do I know that you aren't fu..fucking with me? Prove you're the Doctor."

The Doctor pulled something out of his pocket slowly, keeping a wary eye on Rick's gun. It just looked like a watch with a really big, black armband with a computer screen to Morty, but Rick said, "that's my skimmer! Hand it over!"

The Doctor dropped it and crushed it underfoot. "There's no way I'd ever let you have such dangerous technology. Do you believe me now?"

"You might have stolen it from the Doctor," Rick said. "That doesn't prove anything."

"I'll tell you a memory only the two of us would know. Do you remember the last time we met, when you vomited all over my shoes and passed out?"

Rick lowered the pistol. "It's you alright. I still don't understand how an old, dignified man could turn into a poncy brit with bad fashion sense."

"I'm not poncy!" the Doctor said.

"Tell your hair that," Rick said.

"And your fashion sense Rick? That lab coat would give you a nice air of wisdom and learning, if it wasn't covered in vomit."

"Yeah, well, you might look like a more convincing time traveler if you weren't bouncing around the universe in a blue time box. Your…ULP…your TURDIS is one of the dumbest ships I've ever seen."

"It's a TARDIS and…you know what? Never mind. I'm not letting you get under my skin again."

"Whatever loser," Rick said. "Did you get the stuff?"

The Doctor pulled a few purple crystals out of his pocket. They glowed deep inside with lavender light that added color to the barren landscape.

"How did you get them?" Rick asked. "They're sooo illegal."

"It isn't important," the Doctor said.

"Oh, but I th…URRGG…I think it is," Rick said. "Morty, this is why I brought you here. Those crystals are a restrict…restricted substance, and here you have the Doctor getting them for me. Ask him what they do Morty."

"Wh..what do they do?" Morty asked.

The Doctor had been obviously angry before, but now his fists were clenched and he scowled at Rick.

"It's a drug, Morty," the Doctor said. "A drug only used by depraved, sick individuals. It brings your most disgusting vices to life through hallucinations. It's so dangerous it's banned in every system."

"And yet you got them for me," Rick said. He crossed his arms and grinned. "I win, bitch. You judged me las…last time, but you're not so heroic when you need something, are you?"

The Doctor looked down at the crystals in his hand. "The deal is off, Rick. It isn't worth the price." He put them back in his pocket.

"Oh, boo-hoo," Rick said. "Did I hurt your little he..hero ethics? Are you going to cry now?" He snickered. "Unless you want what you call a ship to be stranded in space you need what I made, don't you? I guess you're…URP…just its pilot, and you can't do maintenance."

"I'm fine at maintenance," the Doctor snapped.

Rick pulled a small gear box out of his pocket. He thumped it, and it started moving. A whirring sound came from inside.

"The funny thing if that it's really…URP…simple," Rick said. "Just a normal component for most types of ships. I guess if you had any skill as a mechanic you could have done it by yourself, but you had to g…get a real inventor, didn't you?"

"What guarantee do I have that it will work?" the Doctor asked.

"Fucking use it," Rick said. "I'll wait."

The Doctor opened the door, still watching Rick warily. "Donna, I need your help."

A woman stepped out of the TARDIS. She wouldn't have stood out in a crowd, except for her eyes. They reminded Rick of an angry bull. "What is it?" she asked.

"I need you to take what he's holding, put it in where the other part broke. It will slide in. Come back and tell me what happens."

"Do you even know what it does?"

"It's part of the guidance system that's never given me problems before," the Doctor said. "I don't usually need to travel far in one timeline without jumping. I usually just move to another time or walk if I'm on a planet. The TARDIS isn't made for normal transport. I mean, it can do it, but it's a very old ship."

She stepped toward Rick and held out a hand. "Give it here," she said.

"Slow down bitch," Rick said. He didn't notice the Doctor turn pale and gasp. "You…you…don't get anything until I get my crystals."

Donna punched Rick in the jaw, sending him sprawling. He dropped the gun as he fell, and Donna deftly grabbed it and pointed it at him while she smirked.

"Oooo," Morty wailed. "Rick, get up. They're gonna kill us."

Rick lay on the ground, looking up at Donna with shocked eyes. He rubbed his jaw and sat up. "That's…that's one hell of a punch you have there, sweetie…UURP."

He stood facing her and paying no attention to the Doctor. "I like you. You know, if you want to travel with a real man, you could come with me. We…we could paint the universe red."

"Listen here, jerk," Donna said. "I've met Hyperion Slime Lords that were less disgusting than you. I've seen more dignified worms, and more attractive Phen Slugs."

Rick stared with an open mouth. "You are literally the…URP…only person in the universe who could say that to me and still turn me…me on."

"This is disgusting!" Donna said.

"No, what's disgusting is the size of my…URP…boner right now."

"I could look, but I'd need a microscope."

The Doctor laughed behind her.

Rick staggered to his feet. "Now listen…" Rick started.

Donna stepped forward and poked Rick in the chest. "No, you listen." She poked him in the chest again. "Give me the part." She poked him harder, making him step back against the ship. "Take what you bought." She poked him harder, pushing him back against the ship. "And then I never want to see your sorry, drunken, narcissistic ass again!"

Rick handed her the part and watched as she showed it to the Doctor. She smiled at the Doctor sweetly. "See. Nothing to it." She walked into the ship.

"Holy shit," Rick said. "If you aren't hitting that you're the dumb…ERRP…dumbest man alive, in any universe."

The Doctor grimaced. "You don't know the situation."

"So gay," Rick said, laughing.

The Doctor sighed. "You are an impossible person, Rick."

"Yeah, well you're an insuff. ..sufferable prick. We all have our shortcomings, except mine help me survive."

Donna poked her head out. "The board lit up."

"Then we can go," the Doctor said.

"Not so quick," Rick said. He pulled out a screw that had a small rotating part on the end. "I thought you might flake out on…ULLPP… on me. This is the other part. Without it your ship will have a nice, comforting elec…elec…trical fire in about an hour. The screw on there is a fake. So you can wait here while I check the purity of these crystals."

"I should have known you'd do something like this," the Doctor said. "Fine, check them."

"I'll be back," Rick said. "I need to…ARRGG…" Rick groaned and held his hand over his stomach. "I'm never eating at Burritos R Us again."

"Morty, stay here and keep an eye on things. I have something…URP…in the ship I need to run these through."

"Wait Rick! You can't leave me here. You..you said he's dangerous."

"The one I expected was dangerous. I'm more worried about the woman than this one. Don't cross her."

Rick turned toward the ship.

"Don't make me stay out here!" Morty said. "You always make me do the dan..dangerous stuff."

"Oh, don't be such a whiny…ULP…little bitch Morty," Rick said. "Just stay out here, shit sack. If there's any trouble just knock on the ship and I'll let you in. Geez. You'd think my own Grandson wouldn't be such a useless pile of shit. I mean, I knew you were dumb, but jeez."

Rick stepped inside the ship.

"Rick! Don't do this!" Morty yelled, but the door was closed. "Rick?" he asked quietly.

"Morty?" the Doctor said behind him.

Morty felt like his blood was freezing. _I'm alone with the dark god,_ he thought. _This guy beat Rick. What's he going to do to me?_

"Morty, can I talk to you?" the Doctor asked.

Morty turned slowly, afraid of what he was going to find. Donna and the Doctor stood together outside the ship. Tears streaked Donna's face, and she covered her open mouth with one hand.

The Doctor looked at Morty with misery on his face. "Does he always treat you like that?"

"That's just Rick," Morty said. "That's just how he is."

"I see bruises on your wrist, Morty. Did he do that?"

"Yeah, but he had to. We were running away from some Bug Monsters, and he grabbed my wrist when I slipped. I..I..I didn't run fast enough, and he saved my life."

The Doctor crouched, putting himself on eye level with Morty, even though he was still about 10 feet away. "You don't have to lie to me, Morty. Does he hit you?"

"No! I mean he ha..had to hit me once to pull me out of a psychic trance, but that's not the kind of guy he is. He's just a dick."

"Your Grandfather is a very bad man," the Doctor said.

"I know," Morty said.

"You know?" the Doctor asked. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I've seen him do some pretty fucked up things. I…I…I try to stop him, but I can't."

"You try to stop him," the Doctor said. He looked up at Donna. "He tries to stop a dangerous criminal."

He looked back to Morty. "That's brave, Morty, but no child should have to bear that sort of burden."

Morty looked toward his Grandfather's ship. "Rick!" he yelled, even though he didn't think he could hear him. "Hurry up!"

"Morty," the Doctor said. His voice was calm, tranquil. Morty turned back to him, and something inside him twisted. He stood back against the ship. "Stay away from me!"

"I don't want to hurt you," the Doctor said. "You can come with me if you want. Rick can't chase me through time, and I can find his signature any time I want to, as long as he's in this dimension. It's loud."

"What do you mean, come w…with you?" Morty asked. "What do you want?"

"I don't want anything from you, Morty. I just don't like seeing you with him. You can trust me."

Morty looked toward the ship, remembering how mean Rick could be. "You can't be telling the truth. No one wants a Mo…Morty around but a Rick. We're dumb as bricks, and we…we're only good to be shields for them."

A sob escaped from Donna. She held her arms out as if to welcome him into a hug. "Oh, Morty," she said. "Come with us. You're not dumb, and we won't curse at you or hurt you."

Morty stepped toward Donna, but he stopped. The Doctor was looking at him with so much compassion, so much…pity?

Morty panicked. "You just want what King Jellybean wanted," he yelled. "Don't come near me."

Morty ran back to the ship and pounded on the window. "Rick, let me in. Get me out..out of here. I wanna go home!"

He looked back, fearing the attack he was certain was coming. The Doctor stood watching him silently with Donna.

"I'm not coming near you," the Doctor said. "You're safe."

Rick stepped out of the ship and tossed the part at the Doctor, who caught it clumsily. "The crystals are good."

He shoved Morty toward the Doctor. "I heard everything, d…dickwads. Take him."

"Ooooo!" Morty screamed. Morty didn't notice the wink that Rick gave him.

"Oh don't be such a piece of monumental shit," Rick said. "You…you're the worst Morty ever. I don't even need you, Morty. I didn't want the crystals to get…ULLLPH…to get high. I can use them to make a psychic shield, Morty. So your annoying little ass just got even more…more pointless, you slimy little turd sack. You annoying, whiny, should-have-been-aborted little snot bubble."

"That is ENOUGH!" the Doctor yelled. He stepped toward Rick, and somehow he seemed more frightening to Morty than Rick ever had. He was afraid of what Rick might let happen to him, but the Doctor was worse than he'd ever seen before.

It was his eyes. Morty stared into those eyes, full of all the anger and power of the pain of knowing the secrets of the universe. For just a moment Morty saw it. He saw the power of the dark god.

Rick reached for his pistol before remembering that Donna had taken it He stepped back. "Okay. No..no need to take this to a violent level. We're all…BLUP…friends here, right?"

"You. Will. Leave," the Doctor said between clenched teeth. "If I ever see you again I will invent a hell for you that you can't imagine."

Rick gulped, and Morty looked in shock. He'd never seen Rick scared of anyone.

Rick stepped into the ship, and before Morty could get in he closed the door.

"Rick no! Don't leave me here!" Morty howled.

"Sorry Morty, but you're less than useless to me now." Morty heard him through a speaker in the door. "I just ne…need your house, Morty, cause it's where my stuff is."

Rick belched loudly. "Ugh. Fucking bur…burritos."

"Rick, take me home," Morty yelled.

Rick opened the door. "Get in, you little shit."

"Morty, you don't have to go," Donna said.

Morty looked at the Doctor and shuddered. The raw power was gone, and he just looked like a goofy man with weird hair and stupid shoes.

But King Jellybean had seemed like a harmless goofy man too.

Rick leaned over so that he could whisper in Morty's ear. "I'm playing a part Morty. Just go with him and get me his se…secrets. He crossed me, and I'm going to steal everything he wants to hi…hide from me."

"Rick, you said a lot of mean stuff," Morty said.

"I didn't mean it," Rick said. "I mean you're an idiot, but you're my idiot. You can come back to me when you find out the secrets. If you ever ne…need to believe that I care about you, I really don't need you for a shield anymore, but I want you to come back to me. But not without those secrets Morty."

"Rick, I don't want to," Morty said. "He's going to…"

"He won't do anything to you," Rick said. "He thinks he's a he…hero. Heroes buy the whole little kid in distress thing like you wouldn't believe. I know you can do it Morty." Rick belched and grimaced as a small amount of vomit came out and dripped down his chin.

"You're a good kid," Rick whispered. "I think I kind of like you."

Rick grabbed the front of Morty's shirt, twisting his hand in it. He pushed Morty out of the ship and closed the door. Morty fell backwards, landing on his butt and watching in disbelief as the ship rose and flew away, a few beer cans falling out as Rick lifted off. Rick stopped about 20 feet above the ground, opened a window, and flipped them all off before speeding away into the darkness of space.

"He left me," Morty said quietly. "I can't be…believe he actually left me."

"It's ok Morty," the Doctor said. "It's better that he's gone."

Morty heard footsteps crunching on the gravel, and he looked back to see the Doctor walking toward him slowly.

"You're going to be ok," the Doctor said soothingly, and for a moment Morty wanted to believe him. But King Jellybean had seemed kind.

Morty scuttled backward and hid behind a large rock. "Ooooo," he howled. "Stay away. You want to do what King Jellybean tried to. I know…know it. Go away. I'll beat you up like I did him."

He heard the Doctor and Donna talking, but he couldn't make out their words.

"Morty," the Doctor called. "That's the only building on the whole planet. It's just a way station for a planet near here to keep their sensor arrays and a few supplies for passing ships. This place has no sentient creatures, and the animals and plants here have arsenides in them. They're poisonous to humans. You can't stay here. You'll die, Morty."

"I want to die," Morty said. "I can't believe he just left me!"

"I'm going to leave some food and water out here, and some blankets," the Doctor said. "We'll go back in the ship so you can feel safe, ok?"

Morty heard the door open and close, and he leaned around the rock to see if they were gone. He watched, wondering what he should do. A few minutes later the door opened and the Doctor stepped out. He put two bundles on the ground and stepped into the ship.

Before he closed the door he called out, "all you have to do is knock on the door, Morty."

When the door closed Morty ran toward the TARDIS, grabbed the bundles, and ran back behind the rock. He put his head on his knees and rocked back and forth. "Ooooo… Damn you Rick!" he yelled.

The night was cold and wet. A light wind made the misty dampness all the more uncomfortable, and Morty huddled behind the rock, wrapped in blankets and feeling numb inside. He heard the door to the TARDIS open, and when he peaked around the rock he saw Donna through the mist, putting a steaming mug on the ground.

"It's cold out here," Donna called. "I made you some tea." She put something else on the ground.

When she went inside Morty went to the tea and took the black jacket on the ground. He put it on. It was large for him, but he liked it. It had patches all over it and the name Ace. Morty rolled up the sleeves and sat down to think.

He drank the tea and shivered behind the rock. He managed to sleep, but he woke only a couple hours later covered in dew.

Dawn came and went, and Morty tried to walk away from the TARDIS, but he found himself making sure he knew where it was, since it was the only landmark. He climbed to the top of a hill, where he could see the surrounding, flatter land. Donna and the Doctor waited below at the ship, and Donna waved at him.

He saw nothing but hills with a few trees in any other direction. There wasn't much more color in full daylight, and everything looked sickly and unwelcoming. Scrub brush seemed to make up much of the landscape. If the Doctor was telling the truth, and from what Rick had said about him he sounded like the kind of person who would, he didn't have much choice.

Morty had to decide. Life on an empty planet, killing what he could for food, if it wasn't poisonous like the Doctor said, and living alone until he died, or getting King Jellybeaned by an alien. He couldn't escape like he had in the bathroom. He would be locked in the ship with the dark god.

The day became hot, and then it became steamy and humid. Morty sweated profusely, and after he drank the water the Doctor had left out for him he thought he should search for a stream. He fought through brush, scratching his legs and arms up. When he finally found a stream he didn't know how to tell if the water was drinkable or not.

Morty realized that even though he had traveled through dimensions with Rick he'd only learned how to survive being attacked. He had no idea how to survive here. He couldn't even survive in the wilderness on his own planet.

The Doctor and Donna had gone inside.

" _Just let it happen",_ he remembered King Jellybean saying as he held him down against the sink, the smell of urine and the King's sugar breath overwhelming him.

He began walking down the hill, but he stopped halfway down, remembering and hesitating.

He didn't know what the Doctor was going to him, but he could escape later. If the guy was a traveler he had to go to other planets, and Morty could escape and find a way to contact Rick. Rick would come for him. He just needed him to get some information. Still though, it was going to hurt to be Jellybeaned.

"Damn you Rick," Morty said. "I hope you have fo…food poisoning from that burrito."

He explored the surrounding countryside, keeping to the flatter areas, but he kept track of where he was by the TARDIS and the building. As he walked he occasionally looked back to see the Doctor following him at a distance, at the same rate he was going, hands in his pockets, and leisurely strolling.

Morty circled the TARDIS in a large circle, nearly falling into a creek and tripping over numerous tree roots. He managed to fall into the shallow part of a creek, soaking himself. The rest of the day he felt hot, wet, and miserable.

A cold, miserable night came quickly, only six hours after daylight, and Morty knew the dangers of the night. It wasn't that people attacked more at night, but he wouldn't be able to see the Doctor if he attacked.

 _Rick said he's dangerous,_ Morty thought. _He might know wilderness survival._

He'd never dried, and as he huddled against a small tree with his shirt stuck to his skin he remembered hanging out with Summer at the park and the time his sister had bought him roller skates. He'd fallen a lot, and he'd finally given up on them, but he loved the proud look on his sister's face as she watched him try.

Morty took two sticks and rubbed them together, trying to make a fire, but after five minutes he gave up and threw the sticks.

"Damn it Rick!"Morty yelled.

"You know, that works better with matches," the Doctor said. Morty saw him nearby. Somehow he had approached to only a couple of yards away while Morty was focused on fire making. He still stood with his hands in his pockets, but Morty's heart beat wildly even though he looked unthreatening.

"Oooo…" Morty screeched as he scooted away, pushing up against the tree. He pulled a small knife out of his pocket. Rick had given it to him for his birthday. "Every boy needs a pocket knife," he'd said. Morty slashed the air with it, hoping he was doing it right.

"Stay back," Morty said. "I'll cut you. I'll do it! I won't let you get me!" His hand shook violently with fear, but he tried to look imposing.

The Doctor simply stared for a few seconds. "Morty…I don't even know what to say."

"Just st…stay back," Morty said.

"This is getting out of hand," the doctor said. "I'm going back to the ship now, and I'll wait there. At least come back to the rock where the supplies are."

He followed the Doctor, keeping just far enough away that he could run if he needed to. He told himself that he wanted to keep an eye on the Doctor's movements for safety, but really Morty just didn't want to lose contact with the only other sentient beings on the planet. The ship's light spun slowly, the only sign of civilization. The Doctor looked back over his shoulder and went inside.

There was fresh food behind the rock, fruit and bread and some sort of hard cheese. Morty ate, wondering when Donna had put it out. _They knew I'd come back,_ he thought. _I really don't have anywhere else to go._

The next day he climbed the hill again, just to have the vantage point and think without the Doctor sneaking up on him. There was nothing but stunted grayish green trees as far as he could see. Morty looked down the hill to see the TARDIS waiting for him.

The Doctor wasn't big, but Morty didn't think he could fight him off. He'd been lucky with King Jellybean, and he knew it. But he didn't want them to leave him alone on the abandoned planet.

As he walked down the hill the Doctor and Donna came out and waited. They didn't approach him, but just stood there waiting. The sun had gone down almost an hour before, and a sharp wind cut through Morty.

Donna reached a hand out, and the Doctor beckoned to him. "No one is going to hurt you," he said. "Come inside where it's warm."

He started toward them, but he stopped again, staring at the Doctor. He wondered if he would hurt him, would slam him down like the King had.

"Go inside," Donna told the Doctor. "Let me talk to him."

The Doctor went in, leaving the door open. Donna closed it behind him, leaving her alone with Morty.

"Well?" she asked. "What's it going to be?"

"I don't know," Morty said. "You seem alright, but he…he's really weird, and scary."

"Trust me, you don't need to be scared of him," Donna said. "He just wants to help you. We both do."

"Why?" Morty asked. "I'm just a Morty. There are infinite Morty's. I'm nothing without my Rick."

"I don't know what infinite Morty's are, but you're the only one I know," Donna said. "You aren't nothing. You know, I think you must be very brave to have survived living with him. The Doctor told me about him, and his crimes."

"He isn't a criminal," Morty said. "He's a freedom fighter. He s..said so."

"Ok, Morty," Donna said. "We can talk about that another time, but he sounds like someone that would be really bad to travel with."

"He is," Morty said. "We're always running from something, or shooting at something, and I…I had to take part in a purge, and that made me all crazy, and we saw our own dead bodies, and it was horrible!" Morty said. "But he's my Grandpa, and I lo…love him."

"It's ok to love him," Donna said. "He's family. He did leave you here though, and the Doctor is the only person with a ship."

"I don't have a choice, do I?" Morty asked. "I can't stay here."

"No," Donna asked. "You'd die here." She held her arms out, inviting him to a hug. "I won't leave you like he did. I promise."

Morty stepped into Donna's arms, hiding in her warmth and closeness. "I just want to go home," Morty said.

"Then we'll take you home," she said.

"In a phone booth?" Morty said. "How is that even a ship? Is the rest of it underground or something?"

"You'll see," she said with a soft smile.

They entered the ship, and Morty gawked at the inside of the TARDIS. "It's bigger on the inside," he said. "Rick w…w…would flip out over this."

"It's a good thing he'll never find out then," the Doctor said. He was standing across the room with his hands in his pockets. He looked different than when he met Rick, more composed somehow. Morty knew that Rick had the effect of making people act crazy around him.

"I can't stop you from telling him when you get home, but you can't look too closely at the technology here. Rick would do horrible things with it."

"I don't care about your technology," Morty said. "Technology is all Rick cares about, and he ju…just uses it to hurt people."

"Ah," the Doctor said. "Well, it couldn't hurt to show you some interesting things that aren't too technological. Do you want to see the inside of the ship, away from the controls?"

 _I'm supposed to get information for Rick,_ Morty thought, but he couldn't forget King Jellybean.

"No," Morty said. "I just want to go home. I'll f…figure out what to do about Rick when I get there."

The Doctor looked disappointed. "If that's what you want then I'll take you home, but do you know how to get there?"

"Sure," Morty said. "It's a planet called Ea…earth in dimension C-137."

"Morty, this ship goes forward and backward in time. I can't go to other dimensions. That's sideways."

It took a moment for what he was saying to sink in. "You mean I can't go home?" Morty asked.

"I could take you to this universe's Earth, to where your home would be, but a Morty and Rick might live there. Rick probably will, and it won't be one that knows you."

"No," Morty said. "My Rick is actually the nicest one to a Morty."

Morty put his hands to his head. "Ooooo. I can't do this." He breathed faster and his chest hurt. "Oooo."

"Morty?" the Doctor asked. "Are you ok?"

"No!" Morty said. "I never wanted to do any of this in the fi…first place, but Rick just has to bring me along on his dumb adventures, and now I can't ever go home. Oh god. What am I su…aupposed to do?"

"We'll find a place for you," the Doctor said. "Somewhere with a loving family that will adopt you."

"You'd do that for me?" Morty asked.

"Yes. Now why don't you go to the kitchen with Donna and get some hot food?"

The kitchen looked like a normal kitchen, except for the appliances, which looked as if they had all come out of a house in the 1950s. Chrome shown everywhere and a large oak table with a red check tablecloth was set for five. "I expected something more… I don't know…sciency?" Morty said.

"He has a whimsical streak," Donna said. "Or the ship does. I'm not really sure. Do you like bacon and eggs?"

"Yes," Morty said.

Donna opened a fridge and took out the food. Morty's stomach growled as she cooked.

"I would have thought that old fashioned co…co…cooking would be gone for someone who could time travel," he said.

"He has food pills and some weird rations, but you don't want those. Trust me. I've tried them."

Donna put the food on the table. "Tell me about yourself," she said.

"I was just a kid, you know, until Rick came back. I just wanted to try to p…pass math class and get with Jessica, and then he showed up, and everything went all weird. I wish he'd never come back, and then me and Mom and Dad and Summer would be happy – well, ki…kind of happy."

"I wish things were different sometimes too," Donna said. "There's someone I wish would act differently, but I can't make him. We just have to accept what we can't change."

"I don't think I want to go to a family," Morty said. "Families mess…mess you up. I just want to find a place to be all by myself. I would bring my sister, but I can't get to her. I can live alone though."

"You're too young for that," Donna said. "You've had to fight for so long. You need to let an adult make the adult decisions for you."

"I guess," Morty said.

When they finished Morty helped her with the dishes.

"I'll show you your room," Donna said. "You need to get some sleep. You can't think very well without it."

As they left he had to go through the main room, and he looked around it in awe. He had seen lots of weird things in his adventures, but there was something amazing about the idea that it was bigger on the inside.

The Doctor was under the main console, his legs sticking out. Morty heard the kind of clicks and metal clunking that Rick made when he worked on things.

"Donna?" the Doctor called. "Hand me my sonic screwdriver."

"Are you sure you can fix it this time?" Donna asked.

"I do know my own ship, just not…err..all of it. It's the gyrochronic stabilizer again."

"I think you're making it up," Donna said.

For a couple of seconds there was silence. "Just give me the screwdriver. This is easier to fix than the last problem."

Morty was closer, so he took the only thing that looked even vaguely like a screwdriver and handed it to him. It was a reflex after helping Rick so often. He stepped back quickly.

"Thanks," the Doctor said. "We've got another problem. Until I fix this I can't actually set our coordinates. I have to find another part. I probably have one though. I keep spares of these stabilizers. They are stabilizers, Donna."

"This thing is falling apart," Donna said.

"Don't talk about her like that!" the Doctor said.

"It's a girl?" Morty asked.

The tinkering sounds stopped. "Hi Morty. Do you feel better?"

"I guess. How can a ship be a girl?"

"Figure of speech," the Doctor said.

"No it isn't," Donna said. "He has a bit of a crush on the ship."

"Oh," Morty said. "Is that all?"

"Well, it isn't normal," Donna said.

"It isn't true, either," the Doctor said.

"That's not so weird. "Rick had a th…thing with this hive mind. He had sex with the population of an entire planet. I don't think one ship is that w…weird."

The Doctor scooted out from under the console. His hair was even worse than before, and he had a streak of grease on his cheek. Morty couldn't be afraid of someone who looked so goofy.

"An entire planet? That's…kind of impressive, really."

The Doctor jumped up and brushed himself off. "Well, now we see how it works with the old part. I'd hate to waste a stabilizer if that one just needed an adjustment," he said.

He grinned maniacally as he threw levers and punched buttons, practically dancing around the large console.

Morty smiled. The Doctor reminded him of a goofy wood elf, one of the ones from Dimension D-334.

The ship lurched, and all of them slipped and fell. Morty fell on the floor, Donna against the wall, and the Doctor fell against the console.

"That could have worked better," the Doctor said. "Morty, hit that green button next to the screen with the wavy green line."

Morty hit the button and the ship settled. "The stabilizer is out, but the backups are still working," the Doctor said.

"Is that bad?" Morty asked.

"It isn't good," the Doctor said, "but I've dealt with worse." He went back to his work, ignoring Donna and Morty as he began to replace a burnt out fuse.

"That's a fuse," Morty said. "Why does a space sh…ship have fuses?"

"There's technology from a lot of different times," the Doctor said. "I've been patching it together for a long time. I'm going to get the other part."

Donna took Morty into the ship, down a corridor and to a room. It was small, and it was decorated like an old lady had done it, with lace curtains, a white bedspread, a side table with a lace doily, and a slim, white lamp. A bathroom connected to the bedroom, and it had an old fashioned stand alone bathtub with claw feet and a white marble sink on a pedestal.

"I'll come get you in the morning," Donna said. "Don't go wandering around the ship. It's dangerous down there."

"Ok, Donna," Morty said. "Thank you."

Donna kissed him on the forehead, and Morty blushed and smiled.

He lay down on the bed and tried to think. He wished thinking was as easy for him as it was for Rick.

His watch buzzed, and he looked at it to see a small video of Rick. "Hey Morty! How's it going?"

"Rick? What are you doing?"

"Che…checking in," Rick said. "Did you we…weasel your way into their hearts?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Rick! This is the wo…worst thing you've ever done to me!"

"Don't be such a wh…whiny little bitch, Morty. I've done much…WOR…worse things to you."

"Donna is really nice, Rick. I don't want to spy on her and the Doctor."

"I want that information. Do you w…want to come home?"

"Yeah Rick, but I…I'm really mad at you this time."

"Since when is that any different?" Rick asked. "Do you…URPPP…think I give a sh…shit?"

"I don't know," Morty said. "What if I just don't come home?"

"That's not much of a threat M…Morty."

"You don't need me," Morty said. "You said…said so."

"Morty, don't talk like that. Just do it and then I'll br…bring you home."

"Ok, Rick," Morty said.

"Alright. And hey. You kn..know that was just an act the other day. R…URGGP…right?"

"Sure Rick. Whatever," Morty said. "It's a good thing I was alone when you c…called."

"I can tell," Rick said. "I have the phone set up to send me a signal when there aren't other life forms around you."

"Rick, I'm scared."

The video stopped.

"Asshole," Morty said, but at least he knew he could find Rick, or Rick could find him.

Morty slept and woke when he felt like it. He didn't know if it was morning, or midnight. He went back along the hallway to the central chamber again, and he was relieved to find that Donna was there alone.

"Well, look who's finally up," she said. "You slept 12 hours. You must have been exhausted."

"I don't get much sleep," Morty said. He looked around the room. There really wasn't anywhere to hide. "Where is…um…I don't know his name."

"He's just the Doctor," Donna said.

"That isn't a n…name," Morty said.

"If you can get his name out of him it's more than I could ever do," Donna said.

"But aren't you his girlfriend?"

"No. Just a traveling companion."

"I'm Rick's traveling companion. Sometimes it's pretty fun. Not this time though."

"He can't hurt you again," Donna said.

"He doesn't hurt me," Morty said. "He's just kind of a d…dick."

"Language Morty," Donna said.

"Sorry," Morty said.

Donna opened the door to the TARDIS, and Morty saw a green field with yellow flowers. "Do you want to go outside? We traveled last night."

"I guess," Morty said. "I end up getting chased by monsters a lot. There aren't any m…monsters here, are there?"

"No monsters," Donna said. "It's just a primitive planet. The Doctor said there are a lot of quaint villages. They used to travel through space, but they decided they liked it better here, so they have what you would consider modern technology, but they don't use more of it than they have to."

Morty went outside, and he and Donna sat under an oak tree. "What do you usually do?" he asked. "Do you fight aliens?"

"We end up doing a lot of running," Donna said. "The Doctor just likes to travel, and he likes to have humans with him."

"He isn't h…human?"

"No. He's a Time Lord," Donna said.

"That sounds like a band name," Morty said.

Donna laughed. "Don't tell him that. He is really serious about his people. He's the last one."

"The last? You mean he doesn't have any f…family?"

"No. Do you have family besides Rick?"

"Yeah. I have my Mom and Dad, and my sister Summer. Mom and Dad kind of s…suck, but I like Summer. She can be annoying, but she doesn't think I'm dumb, and we hang out together sometime."

"You miss them?"

"I guess," Morty said. "I think I'll see them again. Rick will be back. I know he will. I know he acts mean, but he was just doing that for s…show."

Donna sighed. "You don't have to take up for him."

"He's kind of my only friend," Morty said.

"That's not true," Donna said. "You have two new friends now."

The Doctor came over the hill and waved at them. When he got closer Morty saw that he still had the laid back look, as if everything was calm and serene.

"There's a village not too far away. Do you two feel like having a walk?"

Morty looked at Donna, who stood and wiped grass off her pants. "Let's go see it Morty. It might be fun."

"I guess," Morty said. He glanced at the Doctor. "There aren't any monsters there? I've had my fill of monsters."

"No," the Doctor said. "Just humanoids. Really friendly too. There were some kids there about your age, and I met a nice couple that can't have children. They want to meet you. They almost look human."

"But can't I stay with D…Donna?" Morty asked.

"If you want," the Doctor said. "Do you want to travel with us? You seemed scared of me yesterday."

"You're not so bad," Morty said. "Rick made it sound like you were all scary."

"Ah, well, your Grandfather and I have a bit of history together. He knew me when I was younger and more…"

He stopped and grinned in an embarrassed manner. "I was very old when I was young, and rather violent at times."

Morty tried to put that together in his head. "Huh?"

"It's complicated. I kept him from using a very dangerous artifact, and he's never forgiven me."

"You really did beat him then? I didn't think anyone could."

"I kept him from starting a lot of problems," the Doctor said. "Are you sure you don't want to come down to the village?"

"If I st…tay here I'll never see Summer or Mom and Dad again. I even miss Rick, kind of."

"Morty, you know we can't get you back to them," the Doctor said.

"I know, but I think he can find me if he wants to. I bet he could make a p…portal to where I am if he really tried. He just hasn't done it yet, but I know he will."

The compassion in the Doctor's eyes _hurt,_ as if he could see the future, and it involved nothing happy for Morty. No one looked at someone that way if things were going to be ok.

The Doctor reached out and ruffled Morty's hair. It was a spontaneous gesture, one that Morty didn't mind much. If Donna said he was ok, then he should be ok.

As they turned back to the ship Donna took his hand and squeezed it as they walked.

That night Rick contacted him again.

"Did you get any dirt on the Doctor?" Rick asked.

Morty knew that Rick would love hearing about the Doctor's dead family and how he was the last of his people, but he felt oddly protective of his secrets. "No," he said. "He doesn't talk much."

"You need to figure something out," Rick said. "I need…URP…needed you around today."

"Why?" Morty asked. "You have a shield now, right?"

"Someone's gotta help me on my outings," Rick said.

"I'm not shoving seeds up m…my butt again," Morty said.

"You're such a little b…bitch sometimes," Rick said. "Just get me something I can use to humiliate him and come home."

"No," Morty said. "I like him and Donna." On an impulse he said, "I don't know if I'm c…coming home at all."

Rick looked shocked, but only for a second. His rough, angry look came back almost immediately. "Fine. Do that. I don't n…need you anyway."

"I know," Morty said. "You don't really w…want me around anyway."

Rick closed the transmission, and Morty lay on the bed, feeling oddly empty. He rolled onto his side, facing the wall so he could hide as the tears fell.

His dreams were troubled. In them his mother and father were absent, and Summer and Rick traveled together through space. Rick was only kind of mean to her, and when they saw him they didn't know him. He couldn't convince them that they were related.

He woke and wondered how long it would take for them to forget him completely.

Donna was waiting for him at the end of the corridor. "The TARDIS let us know you were up," she said. She lifted his chin gently. "Have you been crying?"

Morty felt his cheeks grow red. "No," he said. "I have allergies."

He didn't enjoy breakfast. Donna was a better cook than his mother, but somehow the food didn't taste right. Rick always made sure he was home before breakfast, probably so his parents didn't make too much of a fuss.

"What's wrong?" Donna asked.

"Nothing," Morty said. "I just m…miss my family. I'm never going to see them again. Rick called me last night."

He showed Donna his watch. "I don't think he'll ever really l…let me come home though."

It was a dull day. He didn't know where the Doctor was, but he stayed away from Donna so he could think. That night Rick contacted him again.

"Well?" he asked. "Did you get over your little f..fit?"

Morty took his watch off and put it on the bed stand. He put his pillow over his head to block out Rick's voice, but he could still hear him faintly. "Morty? Morty, answer me. Are you ok?"

Morty took the pillow off his head. "Like you c…care. He could have, he could have d…done anything to me, Rick. He could have raped me."

"Did he m…molest you Morty? Jesus, I never thought of that. I'll k…URP…kill him!"

"No," Morty said. "No thanks to you though. After what happened with K…King Jellybean, I really thought he wanted to…" Morty stopped and choked back a sob.

Rick was silent, and Morty thought he'd shut off the transmission. He reached to put his watch back on and saw Rick staring at him in shocked horror.

"Morty, why didn't you t…tell me?" Rick asked.

"I tried!" Morty yelled. "Why did you l…leave me?"

"It's ok, Morty," Rick said. He sounded shaken, and he looked unsure, which was something Morty had rarely seen. "I'm going to come get you."

"They're nice to me," Morty said. "The D…Doctor isn't so bad, and Donna is really nice. You don't even l…like me."

"That isn't true," Rick said. "I mean, you can be a little shit sometimes, but you and S…Summer are the only family that stood up for me. I h…haven't forgotten…URP…Morty."

"You have a rotten way of showing gratitude Rick. I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"Morty…,"

"No," Morty said. "No more. Don't pretend you give a s…shit about me. You probably just need something from me, and I'm tired of being your wh…whipping boy. Just go back to the Citadel of Ricks and get another Morty."

"Morty, this isn't the t…time to act brave, you dumbass. What did he…URP…do to you? You never talked like this before. Did he make you drink something that made you feel odd? Do you feel drugged?"

"You never left me alone on an alien planet with s…someone you called a dark god, Rick. This is different."

"Okay, I d…don't know what's going on, but I'm c…coming, Morty. Just find a place to hide until I get there, ok? Grandpa's coming."

Morty put the pillow over the watch, cutting off Rick's video. He could still hear him distantly, but he couldn't make out what he was saying.

Rick lay on his cot, staring at the watch, which only showed a dark grey screen instead of Morty's face. He remembered meeting the Doctor the first time, and the Doctor looking down at him later as he lay on the ground, stunned by something the Doctor had hit him with. It was some sort of non-lethal gun, but it hurt like hell, almost like an Earth stun gun, but it felt as if his skin was on fire.

The Doctor had put his hands behind his back and leaned forward with a vicious smirk. His annoying friend took Rick's time skimmer off of his wrist, and Rick could barely move.

"You asshole!" Rick said.

"Such language!" the Doctor said. "You don't need something like that Rick. I'm doing you a favor by taking it."

"Fuck you!" Rick said.

He saw the Doctor and his friend wince.

"Fuck you, you pansy waist, dank assed…UGG…" Rick belched loudly and vomited, feeling gratified that he'd at least covered the Doctor's shoes in vomit. He passed out wondering if the Doctor was going to kill him.

This man though. This Doctor was different. Not just physically either. Rick had heard of shape shifters before, but that couldn't explain the man he'd traded with on that deserted planet. The first time he'd met the Doctor he'd hated him for that judgmental, superior smirk, those eyes that looked down on him from a self-righteous pedestal.

But this one…when he'd snapped at Rick for how he'd spoken to Morty Rick saw something in those eyes. Something wrong. Those were old eyes, eyes that knew dark things. Eyes that promised destruction in a way Rick had rarely seen.

Rick felt cold and numb. _I left Morty with him. What the hell was I thinking? The other time, when I met him before, that man was the hero type. What is he now? Would he really rape Morty to hurt me?_

The next morning, or afternoon, or night – Morty had completely lost track – the Doctor was manic, talking almost too quickly for Morty to understand.

"You'll love the planet we're going to, Morty," he said. "There's a circus that only comes there once a century, and it's full of crystal animals, and I know the owner. I can get you a ride on a crystal heliphant. It's like an elephant but with wings."

He looked at Morty and stopped. "Morty, are you ill?"

"It's no big deal," Morty said.

The Doctor put his palm against Morty's forehead. "You have a fever," he said. "I have some medicine. Go back to bed and I'll bring you some. Or would you rather Donna bring it?"

It had been so long since Morty had had anyone worry about him. His parents fussed over him, but unless there was something drastically wrong they barely noticed him. And Morty realized that more than anything he just wanted someone to feel safe with.

The Doctor's eyes pulled him in, the pity and care in his face lulling Morty into a sense of safety he hadn't felt since before Rick had come into his life, since…

And Morty realized he'd never felt safe. Even before Rick came back he would lie in bed listening to his parents fight and wondering what was going to happen to him. There were times when he sat with Summer on the couch pretending to watch TV, but really listening to them fight. He remembered the time he'd started to cry a few years ago, and Summer had put her hand over his, sitting there with him, saying nothing and crying herself.

Morty's head felt heavy and hot, and he began to cry. He couldn't stop the tears, and he turned away from embarrassment.

The Doctor pressed his hand against Morty's back, guiding him back toward the passageway. "Back to bed," he said. "You probably got sick sleeping outdoors. Or from all the stress."

Morty let the Doctor walk him back to his room, feeling more tired as they went, and beginning to feel weak.

The Doctor left him at the door, and as Morty crawled into bed he felt sick, but also good somehow. As if he belonged in the TARDIS.

He woke with the Doctor bending over him, but he didn't feel frightened. He knew there was nothing of King Jellybean in the man.

"Sit up and take the medicine," the Doctor said. He sat on the bed by Morty and waited while Morty drank a small glass of something bitter and then a bowl of soup.

When he finished Morty lay down again and closed his eyes.

"No one ever did find a cure for the common cold," the Doctor said. "You'll just have to rest and drink plenty of fluids until you feel better."

"Ok," Morty said. "Thank you."

He felt a hand run through his hair, and when he opened his eyes the Doctor was smiling, but his eyes were sad.

"Drink some water when you wake up," he said. "Just let your body heal. You're safe now, Morty."

Donna found the Doctor later. He was standing outside Morty's room, watching the boy sleep. He leaned against the doorframe with a faraway look.

"What are you doing?" Donna whispered.

"Just remembering," the Doctor said. "They're all so vulnerable at that age, and they all think they have to be strong. I remember Susan…" he stopped.

"Susan?" Donna asked.

"She never liked to admit to being sick," the Doctor said. "I had more trouble convincing her to take her medicine when she was little."

Donna listened quietly, wondering if she'd finally get through at least a few of the mysteries of her friend.

"She tired of traveling too. I know that I treated her better than Rick treated Morty, but I wonder if I did wrong taking her so far away from home in the first place."

He wasn't looking at Donna, but at Morty.

"Did I do anything better for her than Rick did for Morty?" he asked.

"You always think the worst of yourself," Donna said. "You're nothing like that horrid man."

"I don't even know what happened to her," the Doctor said. "If she stayed on Earth she might be alive for all I know, or she might have gone back to Gallifrey and died with the others."

He sighed. "I did what she wanted and let her go so she could have a stable life with the man she loved, but I can't understand why Rick would just throw away a precious child."

Morty stirred and coughed, and Donna watched as the Doctor went to him.

"Morty?" he asked. "How are you feeling?"

"Not good," Morty said in a raspy voice.

The Doctor took his temperature. "You have a low temperature, nothing dangerous."

Donna had never seen him so gentle. She had seen him angry, fearful, worried, and guilty. Oh how many times she'd seen him wallow in guilt, but she'd never seen him actually be a Doctor before.

"Doctor?" Morty asked.

"Yes Morty?"

"I'm s…sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry about. You've given me a great deal, Morty. I'm sorry for the way it happened, but I'm glad you're here. It's been a long time since we've had a child on the ship."

Morty closed his eyes, but the Doctor woke him. "Drink some water first," he said.

Morty sat up and drank, wiping sweat from his face. When the Doctor and Donna left he lay and wait for morning, or night…or whatever.

He partially woke when Rick called, but he felt too lethargic to care.

"Not now, Rick," he said.

"Hold the watch up where I can see…URP…see you," Rick said.

Morty grabbed the watch from his bedside table. "I want to sleep," he said. "You never let me sleep."

"What happened?" Rick asked. "You look…URP…you look terrible."

"You don't exactly look like a m…model yourself," Morty said. "Go away."

"Did he hurt you?" Rick asked. "I almost have a read on your position. The TURDIS has a field protecting it from d…detection, but I think I've almost got it."

"I'm not in any d…danger," Morty said. "I'm just sick."

"I never should have left you with him," Rick said. "I think he did something to your br…brain. Just hold tight. Grandpa's coming, ok?"

Morty didn't answer, because he'd drifted off. Morty didn't know when the transmission cut off, because when he woke the room was dark, but one thought stuck in his mind. _Did he say Grandpa?_

One of the first things Rick had told him and Summer was to call him Rick because he didn't do the whole "Grandpa" thing.

Rick managed to track down the TARDIS the next day, on Earth of all places. He tracked it to a place called Cardiff, and after checking to make sure he had his portal gun and a new laser pistol he knocked on the door.

The Doctor answered it, looking confused. Rick wasn't surprised. He probably didn't get many people knocking on his front door.

"I came for Morty," Rick said.

The Doctor glared at him. "You abandoned him, and now you think you can come back on a whim and take him away?"

"He's my grandson, and I'll be…URP…damned if I let you hurt him, you son of a bitch!" Rick said.

"I'm helping him heal from your mistreatment!" the Doctor said.

"He b…belongs with me," Rick said. "I didn't abandon him. I l…left him here on purpose, and I intended to come back for him from the b…beginning."

"So you say. Donna told me that you've been contacting him. I haven't said anything about it to him, because I thought he'd tell me when he was ready. You traumatized the poor boy, and I'm not letting you hurt him again."

Rick pulled the laser gun. "Take me to him, now."

The Doctor let him pass, but as soon as he was inside and the door closed he stopped walking.

"Huh," Rick said. "You have infinity tech. Nice."

"You know about it?" the Doctor asked.

"Yeah. It's not worth the effort and energy though. I use it to make my flask hold infinite vodka, but it doesn't always work. Where is Morty?"

"I'm not letting you take him," the Doctor said. "If he wants to return home I'll take him, but you've caused enough damage in his life. I suggest you get out of here before Donna comes back with his medicine, or you'll regret it."

"I'll find him myself," Rick said, and pulled the trigger, pulling it several more times when nothing happened. He shook the gun.

"The TARDIS deactivates energy weapons," the Doctor said. "I'm sure you're considering attacking me, but you'd never find Morty, and the TARDIS would never let you leave."

Rick put the pistol away. "I don't know what you did to him, but just let me see my gr…grandson."

"If he tells you to leave will you stop bothering him?" the Doctor asked.

"Yes," Rick said, "but I want to hear it f…from him in person, and I want to make sure it's his own idea."

The Doctor made Rick go first, watching him carefully, and when they came to the right door he stopped Rick.

"He's sick. Don't wake him."

The light fell on Morty, who put an arm across his face without fully waking. "Five more minutes, Mom," he muttered.

"You see?" the Doctor asked. "He's alive. Not well, but now that he's out of danger and can rest he will recover."

Rick went to the bed and looked down at Morty. "Hey," he said. "Wake up. It's t…time to go."

"Rick, what did I tell you?" the Doctor hissed.

Rick ignored him.

"Rick?" Morty asked. "What are you doing here?"

"Came to t…take you home," Rick said. "Look at me."

Rick looked at his eyes closely. "Pupils are the right size," he muttered. "Eyes are gl…URP…glassy though."

He glanced back at the Doctor, and then he picked the water glass up from the bedside table and sniffed it. "What did you give him?" he asked.

"Cold medicine," the Doctor said. "It's mostly acetaminophen with Zinc and Vitamin C."

Rick sniffed the glass again. "I wonder," he said.

"You waited long enough to show concern for him," the Doctor said. "Just leave him with people who will care for him properly."

"He can take care of himself," Rick said. "He does it all the t…time."

"And you see this as a good thing?" the Doctor asked.

"He's a tough kid," Rick said. "When I was his age I'd already killed more G…Groflemites than I could count, and he has to be ready to fight. Sure, other kids get…URP…tucked in at night with a story and some warm milk, but other kids aren't my grandson. When he gets older he'll have more people trying to kill him than he can imagine, and I'm j…just getting him ready for that."

"That's sick Rick. He's a traumatized child, and I'm not sending him with you so you can hurt him worse."

"And what right do you have to keep him, or do your people just abduct k…kids whenever you want?"

"Abduct? You threw him away!"

"It was just a joke! I meant for him to…URP…spy on you, but he wouldn't do it. I'd never abandon him."

"You wouldn't?" Morty asked.

"No!" Rick said. "I always come for you, in the end, don't I?"

"After you let me get almost k…killed," Morty said.

Rick scoffed. "Almost doesn't…URP…count."

"Rick, I'm tired. Can't we talk tomorrow?"

Rick scooped him up in his arms, grunting as he shifted his weight. "I'm taking my grandson and leaving. Don't try to st…stop me."

A loud grinding sound filled the passage way, and Rick saw the corridor end suddenly, turning into a wall.

"The ship seems to like Morty," the Doctor said. "You won't be able to find your way out. Put him down and leave him with me."

Morty struggled. "You always do this, R…Rick. You never ask me what I want."

Rick put him back on the bed, and Morty sat up. "I want to go home without you dragging me off s…somewhere to run away from monsters, or watch you get with a creepy hive-mind, or see my own dead body, or all the other awful st…stuff you do."

"Morty, you're not a normal kid," Rick said.

"Yeah, I know I'm dumb," Morty said.

"No, I mean, normal kids don't attract the attention of interstellar p…police and my enemies. You gotta be able to…URP…gotta be able to defend yourself, and right now you're just a kid."

"I just want to pass math class and get with J…Jessica!" Morty said. "Why is that too much to ask? Why can't I just be family to you?"

"C'Mon, Morty. We have f…fun. Don't you remember all the fun we have?"

"Yeah, it's fun sometimes, when I'm not running for my life, or smuggling seeds for you, or stuff like that. But I don't want to go b…back to that."

Rick looked into his eyes again. "He doped you with s…something. What did he give you?"

Rick turned to look at the Doctor. "I'm staying here until…URP…whatever you gave him leaves his system, and if he tells me that you m…molested him I'll tear you open, do you understand?"

"No one has hurt him but you, Rick. Now, look what you've done. He's already sick, and he doesn't need this. Let the boy sleep."

Rick sat on a Victorian chair and crossed his arms. "I'll wait," he said.

The Doctor rolled his eyes. "Fine," he said. "But don't think that you can sneak out with him. The ship won't let you. Morty needs to decide his own fate."

The Doctor left them alone, and as soon as the door closed Rick pulled out his portal gun and tried to use it, even if he could only get out to England in this dimension. A portal began to open, but it shut down before it was even two feet wide.

"Son of a bitch!" he yelled, waking Morty. Morty screamed and sat up in bed, looking about for danger.

And suddenly Rick saw what the Doctor meant about being traumatized. "It's ok Morty," he said. "Go back to sleep."

"What h…happened?" Morty asked.

"Nothing," Rick said. "I can't make a portal here. I can't take you h…home yet."

"You were going to take me if I wanted to or not, weren't you?"

"Don't be st..stupid, Morty. You want to go home."

"Do I? Do I Rick? To what? To Mom and Dad fighting, or to you sc…scaring the shit out of me on an almost daily basis?"

Morty lay down. "I feel like shit, Rick. I just want to sleep. I never get to sleep enough."

Rick sat and watched Morty as he slept. After several hours he left the room and walked to the end of the corridor, to the place where the new wall had been erected. He looked around for any sign of exit, but it all looked solid. When he poked the wall with a finger it gave slightly and had a fleshy feel. The wall was warm and pulsed slightly.

"I'm not trying to take him," he said to the ship. "I need to talk to the D…Doctor."

A passage opened before him, and when he'd walked a few feet it closed behind him, shutting him off from Morty. "Fine," he said. "I get it. URP. I never met a b…bitchy ship before."

The ship opened and shut passages, guiding Rick to an office where the Doctor was reading an ancient scroll. He looked at Rick with undisguised disgust.

"I don't know what hold you have on him," Rick said, "but give me my gr…grandson back."

"Rick, I already told you…"

"You win," Rick said. "Just give him the antidote to whatever drug you gave him or r…release him from the psychic hold, or undo what you did. I'll just…URP…take him home and let him stay."

"You really expect me to believe you'll just abandon your way of life?" the Doctor said.

"No, but I won't involve him in the d…dangerous parts," Rick said. "I just want him to come home. Mortys and Ricks belong together. He won't survive without me, and I…I won't survive without him. It's just the way of things."

"No one is keeping him here," the Doctor said. "I'll stay in this location until he's well. Come back in a few days and talk to him then. Give him some time to rest. This is a decision he has to make for himself, but I expect you to respect his decision."

The Doctor showed him out, noticing how much older and slumped Rick looked than when he'd arrived.

Rick went home with a heavy heart, heavier than usual, and as he expected Summer was waiting for him.

"I'm working on it," he said. "Morty isn't ready to come h…home yet."

"What did you do?" Summer asked. "Is he dead? Is that it?"

"No," Rick said. "He's sick, and he's with an…associate, I guess you could say. He'll come back when he's…URP…when he's ready."

"I don't believe you," Summer said. "He's mutated or something, isn't he? I want you to take me to him."

"No," Rick said. "I might lose him b…because of the Doctor, and I'm not risking losing you too."

"There's a doctor involved?" Summer asked. "Is he injured? Rick, I want to see Morty," Summer said.

"I said no!" Rick snapped. "You don't know what this g…guy is capable of. Jeez. I can't believe I just left Morty there."

"You did what?" Summer screamed.

"It was supposed to be a joke."

"What kind of joke is it to leave Morty with some dangerous guy?" Summer asked.

"It seemed like a g…good idea at the time," Rick said. He remembered Morty's words. _There's no way I would have done that sober._

"I'm going back in a few days," Rick said. "I'm sure he'll come home then. He's just mad right now."

"You'd better bring him home," Summer said, "or I'll never speak to you again."

"Oh, shut up," Rick grumbled. "I'll take care of it. I always t…take care of it."

After she left he took a long drink from his flask, feeling the good sting of the vodka. He looked at the flask ruefully and put it aside, staring at it as if it were an enemy.

He waited three days, enough for Morty to get tired of traveling with his new friends. Rick was sure that Morty would get tired of the Doctor and his milk-toast morality.

After a few days Rick called Morty, hoping that he wasn't drugged.

"What?" Morty snapped. "What is it th…this time?"

"I waited until you were…URP…over the cold, or whatever," Rick said. "I'll come get you now. The D…Doctor won't keep you once you tell him you're r…ready to go."

"I'm not leaving with you," Morty said.

"I can't take you away unless you want to come, M…Morty," Rick said. "That ship wants to k…keep you there. Don't eat or drink anything the Doctor…URP…gives you, and maybe by tomorrow it will be out of your system."

"No one drugged me!" Morty said. "I just don't w…w…want to go with you!"

"I know you're not feeling like yourself," Rick said. "You always w…want to come home."

"It's the alcohol, Rick!" Morty yelled. "You're never s...sober, and you're a mean drunk. I never know what kind of drugs you're on, and how much trouble I'll get into because of it. You were so messed up with Unity that you didn't know Summer and I w...w...were in the middle of a race war, and how many times have I had to take the wheel because you passed out?"

"It isn't that bad," Rick said. "I always...URP...get you home."

"Sure, unless you do something like let a bug beast get me."

"I thought you were right behind me. I came back and killed it as soon as I realized you hadn't gone through the p...portal."

"Sure, and after you killed that thing you took me home and told Mom that a d...dog attacked me."

Morty lifted his shirt, exposing the long, jagged scar the attack had left across his chest.

"I'm alive because Mom's sort of a doctor," Morty said. "You were drunk Rick. Would you have been that s...sloppy if you were sober?"

"I remember that...URP...differently," Rick said.

"I'm surprised you remember it at all," Morty snapped.

"But we have plenty of g...good times," Rick said. "Remember the Love Connection Experience concert?"

"Yeah. You hadn't drunk much."

Rick reached for his flask and stopped, but Morty noticed the action.

"See! I bet you don't even know you're d...doing it anymore."

"Morty, you're exaggerating the problem. Come home. Everyone...URP...misses you -well, Summer misses you."

"Why? So I can get into dangerous "adventures" and get injured, or see my own dead body? That still f...fucks with me Rick."

"It won't be like that," Rick said.

"Whatever Rick. It's me or the liquor. Which one is it?"

Morty watched Rick closely. He already knew the answer. He just wanted Rick to admit it.

"I'll cut back," Rick said. "Probably need to give the old liver a r…rest anyway."

"No. All or nothing. How long do you think Summer is going to put up with this? How long until you lose everyone b...because of the liquor and drugs?"

"Morty, be...URP... be reasonable," Rick said.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," Morty said. He threw the watch across the room, and when it hit and the transmission cut off he wondered why he didn't feel better.

He found the Doctor toying with his screwdriver.

"I decided," he said. "I told Rick I'm not going b…back."

The Doctor put the partially taken apart screwdriver down and wiped grease off his hands on a shop rag. Even in his preoccupied state Morty thought it was weird how he mixed things like time travel and infinity technology with primitive things like shop rags. Rick had a sonic device that he shoved his hands under to clean them.

The thought hurt a little. Rick said he was too dumb to help, but Morty liked to watch him putter with his inventions.

 _When he's sober he does stuff like that_ , Morty thought, although he wasn't sure he'd ever seen Rick completely sober.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" the Doctor asked. "We can come back in time later if you change your mind, but you'll be older, and it will cause problems to return home then."

"By then I will have forgotten them," Morty said, "and they would have f…forgotten me."

It was amazing how quickly he'd picked up the Doctor and Donna's way of explaining time, the tenses of verbs flowing less certainly but more fluidly than he had been used to.

"They'll never forget you, Morty. It's entirely up to you. There hasn't been a young person on this ship in a long time, and I like having you around."

"I like it here," Morty said. "I'd like to travel without almost getting k…killed all the time."

The Doctor's wistful smile left. "I'll have to think about this. It might be better for you to stay with a planet bound family. Things can get dangerous. I have my own enemies."

Morty remembered those intense moments watching the Doctor and Rick, and he could imagine how that might be.

"I could handle life being k…kind of scary, but with Rick it's just one big blur of motion. And he's so irresponsible that I keep trying to fix things, but I just make them worse. He's just too hard to deal with when he's drunk."

"I don't know much about alcoholism. My people had their own vices, but that wasn't one of them."

"It doesn't matter now," Morty said. "I broke the communicator."

"Then I suppose it's settled," the Doctor said. "Welcome to the family."

"Are we going to tr…travel through time then?" Morty asked.

"All through it, but traveling can wait until you're settled."

The Doctor watched him head toward the kitchen, wondering exactly what he'd gotten himself into.

When the Doctor told Donna she reacted predictably, squealing and hugging him, and he wondered if she realized the serious nature of the situation.

"It means I'll be staying in one time, possibly for decades," he said. "I've done it before, but I had no choice at the time. Being stranded in time is a horrifying experience."

"So take him on trips and come back right after he leaves," Donna said.

"I think he needs more stability than that. Perhaps weekend trips, but I would try to get him back about the same time as we spent away, and the TARDIS doesn't do jumps that precise very well. She can do it, but it strains the engine, and I try to avoid it unless necessary."

"Having a child around will change everything," Donna said.

"I know," the Doctor said. "I think I might need to settle down for awhile, but he's worth it. There's something special about that kid."

Morty was in the Doctor's study looking at the various artifacts and mementos that the Doctor had collected over the years. The Doctor noticed that he avoided touching them.

He handed Morty a small brown ball that lit up when Morty held it, emitting a soft musical tune.

"A friend gave me that a couple hundred years ago," the Doctor said. "It reacts to your bio signs to create a unique music. You can touch anything in here, if you're careful. I don't keep anything dangerous around here."

Morty picked up a small vial of shimmering liquid and held it up so he could see the light through it.

"I learned the hard way that anything I don't know about can hurt me," Morty said, thinking of the cloud-creature called Fart that he had defended only to discover that it meant to eradicate life in his dimension.

And King Jellybean had been nice. Just because the Doctor had turned out ok didn't mean there weren't other men like King Jellybean out there.

"I think you saw some of the worst parts of travel. There are wonderful places I'd like to take you, but we have to see to your education first. I have some friends I'd like you to meet, a young couple that used to travel with me. They live about 100 years ago, give or take. I can't quite remember, but I'm sure it will come to me. I'll just have to compare my memories of important events that happened while they were traveling with me with a history book."

"We're really going to travel through time?" Morty asked.

"We can do it as soon as I can set the coordinates. I just need to remember exactly when I left Eon and Barbara."

The Doctor had to ask Morty to leave him alone in the study after a few minutes of dealing with sudden energy and curiosity, and when he, Donna, and Morty were at the console he threw the levers.

The ship jolted slightly, but it was a smooth jump, and when the door opened Morty looked around. The Doctor was surprised and a little disappointed that Morty seemed unimpressed, but he supposed it must seem tame compared to some of the things he'd seen with Rick.

Ian was home, and he greeted them with all the reserved dignity that the Doctor remembered. It took some explaining and convincing before Ion would believe who he was, but he agreed to test Morty.

The Doctor waited impatiently, looking at pictures on the mantle.

When Ian and Morty returned the Doctor sent Morty back to the TARDIS, but he noticed the sullen look and slouching shoulders.

"You brought me an unusual child," Ian said.

"Ian, before we talk about Morty, I need to know why there aren't any adult pictures of Susan. Did she die?"

"We haven't seen her in years," Ian said. "She and David left to become medical staff in Africa, and we still get letters occasionally, but I don't think she'll ever return to England."

"My Susan - a doctor," the Doctor said. "I like the sound of that."

"She always hoped you would return to visit," Ian said.

"I wanted to respect her wish to live normal life on Earth. I suppose I could go see her there. Do you have an address?"

Ian shook his head. "She travels so much that she sends letters whenever she can, but they never have much of an address, just the names of towns, or care of a mission. She seems happy though."

The Doctor sighed. "I'll have to come back and find her when Morty is older. It will take resources that Morty needs, and Susan seems to have been fine without me."

For just a moment Ian saw such sadness in the Doctor's eyes that he really couldn't believe it was the same confident man he'd traveled with.

"You'll forgive me, I hope, but you are so unlike the Doctor I find it impossible to believe your story."

"The TARDIS is behind your house," the Doctor said. "That's easily remedied."

After verifying the Doctor's story Ian returned to the sitting room.

"But how did it happen?" he asked.

"That is a long and complicated story," the Doctor said.

"I have some time," Ian said.

The Doctor explained the regeneration process to Ian, who shook his head in wonder.

"Amazing," he said. "I miss the old days at times."

"So come with me again! We had some good times!"

"That part of my life is over," Ian said. "And besides, you have other companions now, which brings me to Morty. He's such a strange boy. Who is he?"

"The son of an enemy. His grandfather abandoned him, and he's been traumatized. He's already seen more in his life than many soldiers."

"I can't say I have a high opinion of him," Ian said. "He's one of the crassest people I've ever met. I hope you aren't planning on putting him in school here. I'm sure he would receive daily beatings."

"No. He wants to stay with me. What do you think of his intelligence, Ian? I can't tell if his development is stunted or if there are other problems."

"Doctor, I hate to tell you this, but the boy is rather dim. His math and grammar are abysmal, and he has never even heard of Latin!"

"Those are all things that can be taught. What of his mind, Ian?"

"He distrusts me," Ian said. "That much was immediately obvious. I can't tell you much about his capacity without knowing him better. He seemed to me to be more than a little savage."

"He comes from a savage time," the Doctor said, "and his grandfather is a bad influence."

"All you can do is wait and see if he can learn."

Morty was sullen when they returned to the ship. "Now that you know how dumb I am you want to get rid of me, don't you?"

"I never said you're dumb," the Doctor said.

"No, but he d…did, didn't he?" Morty asked. "Teachers hate me."

"He said you're undereducated, but that isn't the same as dumb, and it isn't your fault."

Morty looked at him mistrustfully. "Now what? Did he say I'm a retard?"

"Morty, that's a very mean word. He said you might be slow, but between your school's failure to teach you and Rick's influence it's hard to tell."

Morty didn't look convinced.

"Even if you turn out to be slow it doesn't matter to me. Most humans aren't very smart compared to Time Lords. I've never let it bother me."

He had an equally hard time with Donna.

"What do you mean he might be slow? He's just a lost, abused child. I'm sure he's smart."

She was standing, hands on hips, glaring at him as if he was the source of all of Morty's problems.

"Donna, would you listen to me?" he asked wearily. "I'm not saying he's stupid. I'm saying Ian couldn't tell. I didn't take into account the cultural differences between the two of them, and they didn't exactly take to each other."

"Morty understood infinity technology," Donna said.

"He did, didn't he?" the Doctor muttered. He rubbed his chin. "I wonder how well he'll do with a proper scientific education. We won't know until we try."

"Well, it's about time you realized, you inconsiderate Martian!"

"I'm not a Martian!" the Doctor said.

Donna huffed off to somewhere in the ship, leaving the Doctor alone and glad that Morty hadn't been there for the encounter. He looked at the chronoscope and frowned. _He's been sleeping irregularly. I should probably get him on some sort of schedule, and how should I start educating him?_

Morty was resistant to the idea of school. "Rick pulled me out so much that I can't pass, and what's the point anyway?"

"You need an education if you want to get anywhere in life," the Doctor said. "What do you want to do with your life?"

"No one has ever asked me that before," Morty said. "Mortys are just Mortys. That's w…what we do."

He explained the interdimensional portal and the infinite Mortys and Ricks. At first the Doctor was confused, and then fascinated, but when Morty told him how the Ricks used the Mortys he was furious.

"My Rick is different," Morty said. He might be the only R…Rick to care about a Morty at all."

"He does care about me," Morty added. "He just isn't good at showing it."

"Showing it is part of caring," the Doctor said.

"I guess," Morty said. "He says he wants me to go h…home, but I don't know if he really means it or not. I don't know anything right now."

"You don't have to make sense of it right now," the Doctor said. "You need to focus on getting settled and healing."

"I'm not injured," Morty said.

"Not physically," the Doctor said, "but your mind has been hurt. I know you haven't been allowed to be a child for a long time, but let me handle the adult responsibilities until you're older."

Morty felt lighter, as if the Doctor had just taken a backpack full of heavy books off his back and put it on himself.

On impulse he hugged the Doctor. "I hope you don't get tired of me," he said.

"I don't think that's likely," the Doctor said. "My companions tend to leave me."

Morty slept well that night, feeling safe in the TARDIS.

The Doctor sat him down in the kitchen the next day and gave him some papers with math questions on them, and others with scientific questions from biology, physics, chemistry, geology, and astrology.

"I just want to see what you know, so I know where to start. I know you won't know a lot of this, but that's ok. I think this could be fun."

"I don't know about it being f…fun," Morty said, but he went to work on the tests.

The Doctor watched as Morty struggled with the math questions, shoving them aside angrily after only writing a few answers. He did the same with the chemistry, biology, and geology tests, but when he got to physics and astronomy his pencil began to move faster, and he finally lost the deepening scowl he'd nurtured since he started the tests.

The Doctor looked over the papers, hardly believing what he was seeing. In his childish, ignorant scrawl Morty had described the basics of physics, but he had gone into space travel in great depths. He didn't have the vocabulary to explain what he knew. He called g-forces "the way moving around in space pushes you back in your seat" and he described faster than light travel as "that bullshit that Rick says can't be done".

He understood the basic concepts though, and at the bottom of the last page he had written a detailed account of the differences between different species and humans, focusing - unfortunately - on what the organs and blood looked like when they died.

It should have been on the biology test, but he had no sense of organization or structure. The entire back of the last test was devoted to dimensional travel, and even though it was clumsily written and with such poor vocabulary that he could barely understand it, the Doctor realized that Morty knew more about interdimensional travel than he did. Of course, he'd never wanted to know.

"How dumb am I?" Morty asked. His face was miserable.

"Morty, I think you might be very smart," the Doctor said.

"That's mean," Morty said. "You don't have to l…lie to me."

"I'm not. You understand some things that you can't explain, but that's only because no one ever taught you how to think systematically, and you just don't have the vocabulary to say what you know."

"Vocabu...what?"

"You don't know the right words because no one ever taught them to you."

"But if I had the right words I could be smart?"

"It's a beginning. Morty, I can't wait to see how much you can learn!"

"Can we do s…something besides math? I'm really bad at math."

"I think we should start with logic and the scientific method and move on from there. We can do math as we go."

He began to explain how to pry apart a question and form a theory, and them how to test a theory to try to find answers. He got so into his own lecture that he didn't notice Donna watching them. He finally looked up and saw her, smiling softly as Morty listened wide eyed.

"That's what Rick does!" Morty said. "He n…never explained it though. He talked about theories and experiments and c…control groups and stuff, but I never knew what he meant."

"I imagine he wasn't trying to explain it so much as just talking about what was happening in the moment," the Doctor said.

"Yeah. He does that."

"You two have been at it for hours," Donna said. "You should stop to eat."

Morty jumped up from the table and ran to her. "Donna, I'm not st…stupid! I might be smart!"

"I knew you were," she said, smirking at the Doctor as if he had personally accused Morty of stupidity.

The Doctor rolled his eyes, but he made sure Donna didn't notice.

Morty wanted more. The Doctor found that his reading level was low, and they had to start there. He expected Morty to get frustrated with the pace, and after he fumbled through a shuddering reading session he shut the book.

"I can't do it," he said.

"You can," the Doctor said. "Let's put the books away. I have something to show you."

They made their way into the ship, to a door that looked like any other to Morty, but when they went into the room it was completely black, floor, ceiling, and walls. It was pure dark until the doctor pushed a button on the door, and then the entire room was filled with galaxies. Morty could see the Doctor's silhouette against the stars that spun slowly around him.

"It's so beautiful," he said.

"I was beginning to wonder if anything would impress you after everything you've seen."

"It doesn't look like this when we travel," Morty said. "We either use a portal or fly threw, but it's mostly blackness and boring stars. This is..."

He stopped and stared as two galaxies collided and merged, the larger one absorbing the smaller one, which slowly became part of it.

The Doctor pointed toward a galaxy, which rushed toward them until it seemed as if it surrounded them.

"That's the Milky Way," the Doctor said. "Where Earth is."

Morty looked all about him. "Why didn't they t…teach this at school?"

"I don't know, but you can make up for lost time."

And make up he did, suddenly developing a love for all he'd been denied.

A week passed by quickly, but the Doctor couldn't think of a way to get Morty a more formal education, so he decided to continue teaching him.

The doctor took him to a few very tame planets to see how he reacted. Morty proved to be timid, and he stuck close to the Doctor. He avoided the local wildlife and plants, and once he stared at a doglike creature, but when the owner asked if he would like to pet it he shook his head and stood back.

"It's safe here," the Doctor said.

It was an entire planet of carnivals, and after an hour Morty finally relaxed and went to the petting zoo. He didn't act like the other children his age. While they interacted with each other he awkwardly watched a girl with leopard spots. When she left he petted a goat with eight legs.

"Is it a spider goat?" he asked.

"Yes. It spins a web like a spider, but it eats plants like a goat."

"Huh," Morty said. "Cool."

The Doctor stayed there until the carnival closed, and when they went back he told Donna everything excitedly. "You should come with us next time," he said.

"I will," she said. "You and I get more time together than you and the Doctor. I thought it would be good for you to have some guy time."

He began to read with more confidence, and the Doctor was forced to search through the library for books he might find interesting.

One day the Doctor was attempting to teach Morty chess when Donna came in with a cake.

"It's been a month since you decided to stay!" she said.

The next day they were back in England, and the discarded watch, which Morty had put on the end table, buzzed.

The video didn't appear, but Morty could make out an image in the shattered glass. It continued for a few minutes and then stopped.

 _So he does remember me_ , he thought. A dark feeling filled him. Rick had been a real jerk, but even though he had told Donna and the Doctor differently, he missed him.

A knock on the door the next day surprised them, and when the Doctor answered the door he saw Rick.

The Doctor shut the door, but Rick had shoved his foot inside, wedging it open. "Just let me talk to M…Morty one more time, and I won't come back if he doesn't want me to."

The Doctor looked down at the foot in his door and briefly considered giving Rick a quick shove.

"Morty, it's up to you," the Doctor said.

"Let him in," Morty said.

Rick looked old to him in a way he'd never seen before. His eyes were dark and hollow, and his face was paler than normal. He'd always been thin, but he'd lost weight and had a haggard, exhausted look about him.

"Morty, I just came to show you this," Rick said, holding a pin out.

Morty took the pin and turned it over in his hand.

"I would have come sooner, but I was in the h…hospital."

"What?" Morty asked. "Why?"

"DT's are a bitch. That's a 30 day sober pin," Morty. "I did it for you, and me. Come home, Morty."

Morty had never seen Rick so sober, or so sad.

"I'll come home next week," he said. "Leave the portal gun with the coordinates."

Rick's face lit up. "I'm glad. It's not the s…same without you. A Rick without a Morty is only half a R…Rick."

Rick left them alone, and Morty felt a stab of pain at the tears on Donna's face on the pain on the Doctor's.

"Is this what you really want?" Donna asked.

"They need me," Morty said. "They're family, and I have to go back."

"I see. We'll go back next week," the Doctor said quietly. "Do you want to have one last game of checkers? I know you like it better than chess."

"Doctor, we're in a t…time traveling ship. I can go home next week whenever I want."

The Doctor chuckled. "You never stop surprising me."

Rick spent the next week enduring his family. It had been easier through an alcohol haze, and he found himself hiding in the garage even more than he had before. He even bought a mini fridge so he could stock basic sandwich supplies to avoid having to go in for dinner unless absolutely necessary.

A week later Rick puttered in his garage, listening for the screeching sounds of the TARDIS or the schloop of a portal being created, but he heard nothing.

He wanted a drink in the worst way, but he stayed in the garage. Beth had locked up the wine at his request, but he could have gotten into it easily.

He toyed with the butter bot, painting racing stripes on it.

"Will this help me pass the butter?" the bot asked.

"It will make you look cool while you do it," Rick said.

"My purpose is to pass butter," it said as it hung its head.

"Be still," Rick said. "You're lucky. Most of us don't to have a purpose in life. The best you can do is look cool on your way towards death."

"Yes, creator."

"I think I'm going to make you a brother and sister to pass the salt and pepper. No one should be alone in this universe."

He heard the doorbell and almost ran for the door, stopping to compose himself before he opened it. To his disappointment a stranger answer the door, a young man with a buzz cut in khaki pants and a polo shirt. He had a scar along his jaw line, or Rick would have taken him for any other boring suburbanite.

Rick barely noticed him before he began to shut the door. The stranger put his foot in the door. Rick looked past him to see if Morty was outside.

"Look, shit face, I'm not going to buy any m…magazines, or vacuum cleaners. Fuck off."

"Don't you kn…now me Rick?"

"Morty?" Rick looked more closely. With the baby fat gone from his face, and that perpetual worried look replaced with confidence, he could barely recognize his grandson.

"I said I'd be back this week," Morty said. "I kept my promise."

Rick laughed. "You sneaky bastard!"

"I wanted to wait until I could d…deal with my family in a healthy way," Morty said. "I've missed all of you, but you are all toxic for me."

"Summer is going to be jealous," Rick said. "She w…wants to be an adult."

"I'm going to hold off on seeing the others for a bit. Let's fire up the old spaceship. There are some places I want to take you."

"What about the Doctor?" Rick asked.

"It was just time to come home," Morty said. "I don't know how long I'll st…stay, but if I leave again it won't be painful. I'm going to take you and Summer with me, show you two space like you've never seen it."

And Rick said something he'd never said in his life. "I don't understand."

"Rick, I forgive you, and I love you. Let's go on s…some adventures. I'm driving."


End file.
